ParentingHub

Temper tantrums are common in children from age 2 onwards. There’s a reason why they call it the Terrible Twos!

The most common times for temper tantrums are before bed, before or during dinner, when you have to leave somewhere, like the park or playground, or in the middle of a shopping centre, when you’ve said no to a toy or a sweet.

Why tantrums happen?
When kids get to the toddling age, their brains are working overtime trying to understand the world around them. Unfortunately they are not able to express themselves or their emotions properly at that age and it can be frustrating for them. They’re not always sure what’s going on around them, they become overwhelmed. Add to that they may be tired or hungry, and you’ve got an explosion waiting to happen.

As a parent its important to understand why your child is having temper tantrums. They’re not being naughty or badly behaved. You need to be able to offer comfort and support, and put measures in place that prevent tantrums before they happen, or learn how to deal with tantrums before they get out of hand.

Preventative Measures
Kids don’t like being taken by surprise or caught unaware. It’s hard enough for them to understand what’s going on during calm times. You can pre-empt temper tantrums by explaining that you’re going to the park, but only for half an hour. That way when you say half an hour is up, your child is aware that it is now home time.

In shopping centres, Louise from Cape Town finds that distraction tactics work best. “I always give my child something to eat or play with while I do the weekly shop. And I make sure to avoid the sweet and toy aisles.”

How To React When Your Child Throws A Tantrum
As a parent it is important not to react negatively when your child is having a melt down in the middle of the frozen pea aisle. Take a deep breath and if you’re in any way rushed or uptight, rather take some time out yourself. Yes, even in a public place.

Do not scream or get angry. This is little more than throwing a tantrum yourself.

Don’t worry what strangers are thinking. You need to be there for your child because you understand that she’s tired and hungry and had a long day and is probably quite overwhelmed at this stage.

Janice from Cape Town says “My daughter was two years old when she threw a spectacular tantrum in Woolworths. I didn’t know how to handle the screaming and shouting, plus I was acutely embarrassed, so I walked away and left her there in the aisle by herself. Shortly after she came running to find me, fearful of being left alone and tantrum forgotten.”

Without an audience, your child won’t continue her antics. Even at that early age they realise there is no point. So walking away is undoubtedly the best policy. Obviously these days there are safety concerns so even if you do walk away, always make sure you are watching from behind the magazine rack or somewhere.

Watch how Author and GMA Parenting Expert Ann Pleshette Murphy helps parents understand what triggers their kids' meltdowns.